Ukubunjwa, Imfundo Secondary nezikolo
Izinto funny kwi intsimbi yokugqibela (Grade 9). Imifanekiso kwiziko lootitshala bezifundo intsimbi wokugqibela
Ekupheleni kweBanga le-9 - isiganeko ebalulekileyo bonke abafundi. Umntu ke usuka esikolweni, umntu uyaqhubeka izifundo zakhe, kodwa zonke oobhuti va zaba bit abadala. Kungenxa yoko le nto kubaluleke isimemo lokugqibela.
Imifanekiso kule yokugqibela intsimbi yeBakala 9 (funny)
Kuyo yonke le yoqeqesho guys ne-ngcebiso - utitshala weklasi. Yaba lo utitshala uyazi ukuba bhetele kunaye nabani na. Xa ukulungiselela ukungeniswa akakwazi abe (it) ngoyaba.
Ukhetho umdla bekuya kuba Izigcawu ubizo lokugqibela (Grade 9) malunga iinkokeli umfundi. Omnye wabo ithiwe thaca apha ngasezantsi.
Kwi iklasi umhombiso yeqonga. A iphowusta "Wamkelekile, abaphumelele .... ! Unyaka "ngenxa kwedesika ngutitshala wahlala ngutitshala abadala - utitshala weklasi, xa amadoda iidesika abadala kunye nabasetyhini. Bayakwazi ukudlala zombini benxibe izidanga namhlanje kunye nabazali babo.
Owayesakuba abafundi baqala ukuba ukukhumbula iminyaka yam yesikolo.
- Marya, khumbula, siya kwibakala 6 abakhoyo iqhosha esitulweni yakho kanye, athi ke omnye - wathulula glue?
Utitshala uyancuma, abaphumeleleyo ehleka ethekweni.
- Marya, kwaye khumbula ukuba ndabusithelisa magazini wethu, wena iiveki ezingaphezu kwe-2 oyifunayo? Usenakho ngoko phantse ndayihluthwa yesahlulo.
Kwakhona, wonke umntu uqala ukuhleka, yaye utitshala iyaqhubeka uncumo lusizi.
- Marya, khumbula kwibakala 10, sabaleka njani esikolweni,, luntsileka mouse ofileyo kwidesika yakho?
Kwakhona, ukuhleka Ulibengezelele bafundi notitshala.
Emva koko uvuka, ulungelelanisa iindondo zakhe waza wathi:
- Ke nina, ningabafundi bam abaziintanda, khumbula, kwibanga-6, ndayibeka yonke deuce kolawulo, nto ke leyo ebangele ukuba sahlala iveki emva kwesikolo? Kwaye uhambo lwethu xa kusithiwa ilahlekile? Yinto nje emva bali kunye phephancwadi. Kwaye ke, njengoko ziye zanyanzela iintloko liphela "War Noxolo" ngentloko, khumbula? Eneneni, kwaba mnandi.
Ngoku utitshala wahleka, ujonge ubuso kudubadubeka abafundi bakhe bangaphambili.
Ezi miniatures kuya kuba mnandi kakhulu ukuba iindwendwe kwakunye ngokwabo bafundi. Ngoko ke, siye sagqiba ukuba phawu olusisinyanzelo yokubhiyozela kufuneka nomzobo ubizo lokugqibela (Grade 9). ootitshala bezifundo ngo ubizo yokugqibela umdla ethile ezilungiselele abafundi babo.
Imifanekiso ukuba utitshala ulwimi Russian kunye neencwadi
Utitshala yokuqala, kubo ukhumbula wonke umfundi ngutitshala lolwimi Russian kunye noncwadi.
izifundo ezininzi, dictations engaphele ndawo, iingxelo, izincoko - konke malunga izifundo kweso sifundo ephambili yesikolo. Kungenxa yoko le nto imifanekiso funny kwi ubizo lokugqibela (Grade 9) malunga utitshala luqala ulwimi Russian.
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- Popov, amagama igama uhlobo "kwikhabhinethi", "ehlathini", "Ekhaya", "lelonani".
- Ukuhlola, iinkuni, ndlu - njengendoda, lelonani - ababhinqileyo.
- I wonder, ngaba ufumana phi oko?
- Ngako oko iikawusi ngabafazi kuphela.
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- Krasnov, kucinga isivakalisi kunye namalungu eyohlobo olulodwa.
- Ehlathini, kungekho luhlaza, akukho imithi, akukho ematyholweni.
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Utitshala ucacisa:
- izichasi - amagama kunye neentsingiselo esahlukileyo. Umzekelo, elide - mfutshane, ekhawulezayo - slow, kulula - nzima. Vasilyev ucinga umzekelo.
Vasilyev uthi:
- ikati - inja.
- Kodwa kutheni na isigqibo ukuba kube aphikisanayo?
- njani kutheni? Ba malunga kwaye rhoqo ukulwa.
Imifanekiso ootitshala imathematika nenzululwazi yekhompyutha
Xa abafundi beqala ukuba zizakhele ngezigcawu yokugqibela esezantsi yentsimbi (9 grade) kootitshala kwizifundo zemathematika kuzo ekhethekileyo indawo.
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- Petushki, wena ekugqibeleni sifike wafunda ukubala ukuya kwishumi. Andikwazi ukucinga oko kuya kubakho emva kwesikolo.
- IJaji yamanqindi, okuphendula S ..
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- Petrov, ucinge ukuba epokothweni yakho engange-10, yaye wacela Pope uye 10. engange Zingaphi uya kuba?
- 10, Irina Sergeevna.
- Petrov! Akukho ulwazi lwemathematika!
- Ndiyoyika ke, eningakwaziyo nina malunga utata wam.
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- Pugovkin, phinda ezintlanu ezisibhozo.
- Helena, ndiyavuma ukuba ukunika iimpendulo kwimibuzo yakho kuphela xa kukho igqwetha lakhe.
Wena ke asingekhe silibale ngayo ootitshala besayensi le.
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utitshala wezenzululwazi engena kwisebe yamathala eencwadi yaye ebona ukuba thala ayikho apho. Wacela abafundi apho yena. Abo uyaphendula:
- Kungenxa kwindawo yogcino.
Utitshala wathi:
- iziphu nto, nceda.
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- Pavel Sergeyevich, ikhompyutha yam wabamba intsholongwane.
- Kwaye wenza ntoni?
- Fumana ukugonywa.
- Phi?
- phantsi ingalo yakhe.
Imifanekiso ootitshala biology
imiboniso funny lefowuni wokugqibela abafundi bebanga 9 kufuneka unikezele kunye notitshala eziphilayo.
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Utitshala uyalela isifundo:
- Ngubani undixelele yintoni umahluko phakathi komlambo ulwandle?
Omnye umfundi waphendula wathi:
- Xa lo mfula neebhanki ezimbini, yaye ulwandle - nje omnye.
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- Lepeshkin kutheni abantu luvo?
- Ukuze novalo, noLidiya.
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- Soft, ngaba ucinga, oko kuthunyelwa intaka kunye udiza ngomlomo wayo?
- I-bar-cocktail, Irina Sergeevna.
Scene ootitshala IsiNgesi
izinto funny kwi intsimbi yokugqibela (Grade 9) malunga IsiNgesi ivuyisane bonke abakhoyo. Umzekelo thumbnails anjalo thaca ngezantsi.
Ingaba ukuhlolwa IsiNgesi. Ey Teacher:
- Akunjalo abazi nto .. ibiya kuba yintoni lula ukubuza .. Kulungile ... Yintoni likomkhulu of Great Britain ?
Umfundi cwaka. Utitshala uba novalo:
- Kaloku, igama kwekomkhulu Great Britain?
- Bucharest.
Utitshala ukuluma:
- No! London! Two! Makhe eze elandelayo!
Umfundi uya epasejini omnye wambuza:
- Kaloku, bamcelayo?
Ucacisa kulowo wabuza likomkhulu yaseBritani, yaye kufuneka siphendule ukuba ikomkhulu - lo London. It inikeza ofunda:
- Makhe ndenze wena unekhasi oqhathaniselayo kwi yintende Iglu, nje xa kunokwenzeka - "Lan-dan".
Endleleni eya iklasi iyasazi esigingqini.
osanda Utitshala uthi:
- Ngenani, kuza! Umbuzo wam ke: "Yintoni na ikomkhulu Great Britain?"
Umfundi ngokukhawuleza ikrwaqula yedwa yakhe waza waphendula ngokuqiniseka:
- Adidas.
Ukongeza, ezi zinto kwi ootitshala intsimbi lokugqibela (ibakala 9) kusenokuquka iingxoxo ezimfutshane funny.
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Ukuthetha unina kunye nentombi. Ntombi uyabuza:
- mama, uthi 'ezimnandi'.
Umama baxakwe:
- Kutheni? Iyintoni na yonke loo nto?
- Kaloku, yintoni umahluko? phinda nje konke, its not nzima.
- Kutheni ndifanele ukuphinda akucaci ntoni? Ngeke!
- Yiloo nto! kutheni Wandule ke undenzele ukufunda IsiNgesi?
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- Kaloku kukhona eNgilani? Kwakukho iingxaki ngolwimi?
- I andikwenzi; kodwa British baba ...
Scene for ootitshala beJografi
Abafundi eza kunye skits funny kutyelelo lokugqibela (ibakala 9), musa ukuya kugqitha kunye nootitshala nokwakheka.
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- uPetros, yintoni na oyaziyo iPanama Canal?
- Akukho, noLidiya, eriyali lethu bungasifumani.
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Utitshala ucacisa kwisifundo, ubalisa ibali New Guinea.
Umfundi icacisa:
- Ngoko ke kukho njalo ihlobo?
UMfundisi uthi:
- Ewe.
Umfundi ne njengentsebezo:
- Lucky. iholide obunguNaphakade.
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- ngeenyawo, ukuba awunako undixelele ikomkhulu Argentina?
- Uxolo, Julia, kodwa mna andikwazi.
Imifanekiso kootitshala kwimbali kunye nezentlalo
Ukwenza imizobo kutyelelo lokugqibela (Grade 9) kwezi zifundo, abafundi musa ukulibala malunga ootitshala yembali kunye nenzululwazi kwezentlalo. Nantsi ke imeko encinane, nto leyo kubekwa phezu ngokuhlwa zegala.
Utitshala uqala ukujonga wasekhaya.
- Ngoko ke, isifundo yokugqibela sithetha ngayo uNapoleon. Nceda Sinichkina khawundixelele into ukhumbule.
UGrade ngokunzulu wema waza wathi:
- Lydia Y., kutheni phulaphula kum? Makhe UNapoleon asixelela yona ngaye.
Teacher angala:
- Kodwa ngaba nicinga njani?
Sinichkin ngokuziqhenya uphendula:
- Kwaye ngoku siyakuba wayebhula, tsalela uNapoleon ubuze ngayo yonke into.
Utitshala uyavuma bonke bahlale itafile. Sinichkin uqala ukubiza Napoli, owathi emva kwemizuzwana embalwa libonakala kwikona eklasini kwi umnqwazi odumileyo cocked kunye ilizwi sepulchral uthi:
- igama umyalelo kaKesare ukubeka Sergey Sinichkina "5" kunyaka ka kwembali.
Mfundisi esaba:
- Your Imperial soBekekileyo .. Kodwa .. yena akazi nto ngalo mbandela .. Into kum ilizwi lakho izandi eziqhelekileyo ... Kodwa kutheni na izihlangu aphilileyo?
Ngokukhawuleza iza uNapoleon, iinyembezi cocked kwaye afunde Lisichkina.
Utitshala wavuya bathi:
- So Lisichkin. Nje musani ukukholwa ... Kulungile, Makhe ukuqhubeka incoko yethu.
kwakhona Bonke bahlale itafile kunye utitshala uthi:
- Calling abazali Sinichkina kunye Lisichkina.
Umntu bedidekile unoxanduva ingozi kunye ukuhleka ofunda ukugqibezela ndawo.
Unako kwakhona beat ezimbalwa iincoko omfutshane kwisifundo imbali kunye nenzululwazi kwezentlalo.
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Utitshala uyabuza:
- Little Johnny, ukuba amaqhawe zobunene ntoni bangi abhubhe?
Little Johnny uphendula athi:
- Ukunikezela ezilahliweyo, Irina Sergeevna.
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- Ngoko ke, njengokuba besendinixelele kwisifundo yokugqibela, silawule namhlanje.
- A wokubala ingasetyenziswa, Marya Ivanovna?
- Kunokwenzeka, Little Johnny, unako.
- A neprotrektha?
- Nceda, Little Johnny, kwezempilo. Ngoko ke bhala komxholo othi "Ihlabathi yokomoya yomntu."
Imifanekiso kootitshala physics kanye chemistry
Ukwenza imizobo kutyelelo lokugqibela (Grade 9), nto leyo kuqala ukuba zizakhele imeko elide phambi kokuba iholide, asinakukwazi ngoyaba nayiphi na ootitshala. Apha ngezantsi kukho iinketho ze thumbnails kootitshala physics kunye chemistry.
Physics isifundo.
Utitshala iqala vo:
- Ngoko ke, makhe kukuphulaphula. Bakhumbuze ukuba umgaqo Archimedes '.
A uyaphendula Umfundi:
- I umzimba antywiliselwa engamanzi, uya extrude umthamo ubunzima elingana umzimba.
Iyivume basichasa ngamandla:
- mthetho Eyona engalunganga! Last esihambayo!
Mfundisi abanomdla:
- Yiza, masenze inkcukacha, uBob, yintoni na ukuba uyenze?
Iyivume uthi:
- Kaloku, efana ntoni? umzimba Own ndantywiliselwa webhate ulwelo h 4 ndahlala kuvelile, emkhenkceni.
- Inzululwazi ukuba ityala?
- yintoni njani? Apha ndivumele kuphela ziya kuwa, ndiza kwenza oko!
Umfundi walahlekelwa umonde:
- Wenze ntoni na?
Iyivume ku impendulo:
- Kaloku, Ndabaphalaza amanzi aba sokuhlambela, yakhwela kulo ...
Class nengoma:
- ke ???
Iyivume uthi:
- abamelwane enyukela wamemeza natekla ichibi yonke kunye kwaleyo!
Teacher ngovuyo:
- Yiloo nto! Yaye yintoni elandelayo koku?
Iyivume irritably uthi:
- Yintoni ke Archimedes ngokwakhe kwaye ngoku kutywinwe iintanda!
Umfundi lwe iphawu lemifanekiso uboniso Ulwimi:
- Ewe, ubushushu, wena ungazi nto of physics!
Utitshala, ukuba ezinye iyivume sakujika:
- Zaitsev, kakuhle, ubuncinane Uyakhumbula na? Emva uviwo ukuthatha ngaphi?
Iyivume Second uyaphendula ilizwi umoya:
- Zonke Ndikhumbula Helena, nje abazi nto!
Utitshala uyakhululeka:
- Hayi, awukwazi ukuthetha nawe! Zombini ufumana phezu deuce. Ngomso ilinde ukuba wonke umntu ukuvavanya uviwo!
Teacher entengo:
- Yonke ixesha ukubhala phantsi umsebenzi wakho? Ndihlamba.
Iyivume ku impendulo:
- Linda! Ndiseyilaa ukuba zikotshwe ngokupheleleyo lo mfanekiso!
Mfundisi wayedideke:
- Lo mfanekiso, ngeenxa zonke, kunye nefomu noshowo le halogen.
Ivume, okwenza ubuso batyakatywa;
- Ewe, yintoni ifomula? Yinto nje "ibhokisi elimnyama" wegcisa Repin!
Teacher angala:
- Oko brilliant kangaka?
Iyivume uyakhululeka:
- Loo nto icace kangaka.
Mfundisi izwi ukudangala
- Kaloku, wena, njengesiqhelo, kwisifundo ezifundwa deuce.
A dvoechnitsy ilizwi nebhetshi entsha:
- Ukuba ndifuna "ezigqwesileyo"?
Utitshala waphendula wathi:
- Kaloku, ufuna ezintlanu, bhala ukuba formula ethyl utywala.
- Ndidinga enye icebiso. Molo, Gogo, abaninzi bathi formula ethyl utywala, ngoko ke umbuzo kwemihlanu isonjululwe.
Ugogo athi:
- Ngoko ke andazi chemistry, umzukulwana. Tse ezimbini ..
okubuhlungu Dvoechnitsa uphinda:
- Tse ezimbini.
Mfundisi zokulindela ukuqhubeka:
- Ngoko ke, uthini ke?
Dvoechnitsa ilizwi ukuzenza iyaqhubeka ukubuza uninakhulu:
- Babulechka nawe phantse ugqibe, zama ukukhumbula ngaphezulu!
Ugogo athi:
- Yintoni apho ukuze ukhumbule, ndiye sele wakhumbula, amaxesha amaninzi nje ezintlanu!
Umfundi ucela:
- Njengoko kakhulu emihlanu?
Mfundisi ilizwi bazibeke uthi:
- loo nto! n-2, Al-5.
Dvoechnitsa:
- Oh!
Mfundisi, bevuma intloko yakhe:
- Kaloku, phantse! c-2, Al-5, nge - uthuthu. Kulungile, wena ufumane phezulu amahlanu thabatha.
Scene ootitshala physical education
Kakade ke, akukho izigcawu ubizo lokugqibela (ibakala 9) akayi kulawula ngaphandle imithambo yakho oyithandayo.
amakhonkco intsimbi School. Eqongeni, xa nezemidlalo, emi umfundi Pugovkin bodwa omhle. Utitshala imfundo Physical weza ejimini, wangcwatyelwa kwiphephancwadi, wathi, ngaphandle wakhangela phezulu:
- Welcome! Class, line up! Omnye-pay!
Pugovkin, singa, wathi:
- One.
Misa. Utitshala ujonga phezulu, uyakubona ukuba kungabikho mntu wumbi kwaye threateningly wabuza:
-Taaak, Iphi na kwabanye? Mooch, eh?
Pugovkin esaba:
- Hayi, hayi, Valery Semenovich, banezizathu elungileyo.
Utitshala, akukho ngaphantsi usongo:
- ngentlonelo, nithi? Yiza, ngok bonke bephela apha!
Pugovkin aphume ejimini kwaye kamva umzuzu wabuya neklasi yonke.
Utitshala udumisa Pugovkina:
- Hee ke, Pugovkin. Ngoku siyaqonda. Nguwe yokuqala, kulula. Apho le fomu?
Easy-to-impendulo:
- Bonisa, ngokuhlwa NdinguMenzi sele ndahlamba yaye hung ngaso ukuba zome phezu kocingo. Ngequbuliso, waphuma ndawo, kwakukho inja engathethekiyo, nabo bonke wayaphula.
Mfundisi wayedideke:
- Kakade ke, ndiyaqonda, kodwa apho ucingo, ngenxa yokuba ubomi emhlabeni-7? Kulungile, yonke into icacile kunye nawe. Uthini na wena, Petrov?
Petrov uthi:
- Oh, ndaphukile iqatha lam izolo. Oko kulungile .. ekhohlo .. Kaloku, ngokubanzi, zombini ..
Ootitshala ukuqonda ilizwi:
- ecacileyo. Yintoni na wena, Simon? Too iqatha ubuhlungu?
Ngamabo- USimon uthi:
- Hayi, kufuneka umqala obuhlungu.
Teacher tone enento:
- abuhlungu umqala, ngoko ... Ngoko ke, nokubopha umlenze wakhe, huh?
Simon asabela ngokukhawuleza:
- Nuuuu, yena nyebelele it .. ..
Utitshala unqwale intloko ize ithi:
- Kaloku, kanye. Shishkov, Uya njani ukukucacisa?
Shishkov tone swii:
- Bonisa, Valery Semenovich, kum izolo amakhwenkwe ka 11 "A" watsho ukuba wenze namhlanje uya kuba kungabikho sikolo. Okuseleyo ukuba ukhuphiswano kwijiminastiki!
Ootitshala iimpendulo bamangaliswa kunene:
- Oh, wow ... .. Abayila Gimnatika enye .. Kaloku, njengokuba Vorobyev nto?
Oongqatyana absently:
- mna ndididekile ngoku iintsuku. Ndandicinga ngoLwesithathu, kodwa ngoLwesine. I nokuba iincwadi ngoLwesithathu kuye, ndiza kukubonisa.
Mfundisi tone bazibeke
- Kaloku, ngoko, yonke iklasi ngenxa yokungabikho ifomu wabeka "ezimbini". Ngoku uhleli, siye wakhupha nencwadi ubhale isihloko esithi "yemihla ngemihla."
Pugovkin lidubadubekile;
- Valery Semenovich, kodwa mna ntoni na?
Teacher lidubadubekile;
- Oh, ewe, Pugovkin. Ke wena, isicwangciso, aphilileyo ukuwela leekhilomitha-2.
Imifanekiso kootitshala Arts and Technology
izinto funny kwi intsimbi lokugqibela (ibakala 9) akayi ukuphatha ngaphandle akhankanye izifundo zobuGcisa.
Abantwana bahlala esezidesikeni zawo uze uzobe ngenkuthalo. Utitshala uhamba phakathi kwemiqolo, itshekhi kusebenza. Kukushkin eyeka kwidesika aze abuze:
- It nguwe arhola?
Kukushkin ukuphendula:
- Like ntoni? Sitsha. Wena ngokwakho wabuza.
- Yintoni Ndathi, njengoko ndikhumbula. Andiluqondi into esondela.
- Kaloku, Olga, kuyinto ivazi! Nje ngoko ke ndiyabona. Wena umculi, kufuneka ukuqonda kum.
UMfundisi uthi:
- Kaloku, Makhe idayari.
Ngokuzolileyo uthatha idayari ibeka deuce. Kukushkin is ngokungapheliyo;
- Deuce? Ngokuba yintoni?
Utitshala uthi:
- Yintoni na kuwe, Petros, akukho ezimbini, ukuba ezintlanu. Nje ngoko ke ndiyabona.
Imifanekiso kule yokugqibela intsimbi yeBakala 9 (funny) liya kuba yindawo kuzo zonke izifundo. Technology kungekho ngaphandle.
Technology meza utitshala weklasi:
- Ngubani waphula ngamaplanga? Ndiyakucela nawe, impendulo!
Abafundi eme, iintloko baqubuda. Ekugqibeleni, omnye uthi:
- Kutheni ngamaplanga? Basengaba iglasi?
Utitshala basi-:
- Glass ngokwam kwi kusile. Ngabeka ngamaplanga. Ndagqibela nini ukubuza umbuzo, lowo waphula ngamaplanga?
Ngaloo ndlela, ungenza iintlobo ngeentlobo imiboniso kutyelelo lokugqibela (Grade 9). Imeko - ngqondo echwayithileyo - enkulu, abafundi, ootitshala nabazali - ukuba zintle, kuhle, bonwabile. Kufuneka ukhangele njenge ngokuhlwa owaziwa ngedinala azinikele ekupheleni kweBakala 9.
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