Uvavanyo lukaTomas: iintlobo zokuziphatha ezingquzulwano

Ingxabano phakathi kwabantu iyavela ngokuqinisekileyo. Akunakwenzeka ukufumana abantu ababini abaneemvo zabo eziya kuhambelana ngokupheleleyo.

Ngakolunye uhlangothi, oku kubi, kwaye kwenye - ubukho beembono eziliqela kumbono kukuvumela ukuba uhlalutye kumacandelo ahlukeneyo kwaye ufumene isisombululo esona siphumelele kwingxaki okanye ingxaki evelele. Ngokudlulileyo, isisombululo esifanelekileyo sokuxabana sinokuqinisa nokuphucula ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu.

Indlela yokuziphatha kwimpikiswano

Ukuze unqobe ngokufanelekileyo imeko yoxhatshazo, kuyimfuneko ukukhetha umgca ophezulu wokuziphatha, kodwa oku akunjalo lula. Njengomthetho, umntu ngamnye unomgca owodwa kuphela, okhetha ukuba angatshintshi.

Ingxaki yokuziphatha komntu kwiimeko zokungqubuzana yayisenziwa ngokuthe ngqo kwi-psychologist yaseMelika uKenneth Thomas. Wavavanya izenzo zabantu ngeendlela ezimbini:

• Ingakanani umntu ofuna ukukhusela iimfuno zakhe kwimpikiswano (ukuqinisekiswa).
• Ingakanani umntu enomdla wokuqwalasela iimfuno zabanye (intsebenziswano).

Njengomphumo wophando olude, isazi sezengqondo sakwazi ukuhlukanisa iintlobo ezintlanu zokuziphatha komntu kwiimeko ezingqubuzanayo. Kamva, ngokubambisana noRalph Kilman, wavelisa uvavanyo olukhethekileyo lukaTomas-Kilman, oluvumela ukukhetha ukuba zeziphi iziphatho zizinto ezibonakalayo zomntu othile.

Inkcazelo yenkqubo

Kwiindawo ezininzi le mibuzo idlalwa ngokukhawuleza - uvavanyo lukaTomas. Inkcazo yalo ithatha imigca embalwa nje.

Ngandlela-thile yeendlela ezintlanu zokuphendula kwimpikiswano ichazwe ngoncedo lwezigwebo ezili-12, kwaye ke zona zidibeneyo zibe ngamaqela angama-30. Esi sifundo simele sikhethe kwibini nganye yeengxelo ezibonakala ngathi zithembekileyo.

Isicatshulwa kwimibuzo lemibuzo ngokwayo iyaziwa ngokubanzi kwaye kuya kuba nzima ukuyifumana. Kuzo zonke izinto ezilula, ukuvavanywa kukaTomas, iziphumo zazo ezinokuthi zingalindelekanga ngokupheleleyo, zinokuzisa iingeniso ezibonakalayo kwaye ziququzelele kakhulu ukuqonda amandla kunye nobuthathaka bomntu ngamnye.

Ukuchazwa kweziphumo

Isihluthulelo sokuvavanya itafile ekhethekileyo, onokuyifumanisa ukuba yeyiphi indlela yokuziphatha kwimpikiswano isifundo esincinane. Emva kokuba ufunde olu hlobo, umntu unokukwazi ukuchaza ngokucacileyo indlela ulwaphulo oluza kuphuhliswa ngayo kwaye yintoni efunekayo ukuze icombulule ngokukhawuleza.

Indlela kaTomas ibonisa ukuba umntu ngamnye unomdla wokuthatha ingxaki kwimpikiswano kwiimeko ezihlanu. Ukubonakala okukhethekileyo, kunokuthelekiswa nendlela yokuziphatha yesilwanyana:

• Ukhuphiswano lwe-Shark, ukhuphiswano.
• Ibhere le-teddy lilungelelanisa, ukuzama ukulungisa ingxabano.
• Ukuthungula - ukukhusela ingxabano, ukuphepha kwayo.
• I-fox yinto engathintekiyo.
• Owl - intsebenziswano.

Ngalunye lwalezi ziganeko zinamacandelwana awo antle kwaye angalunganga, kwaye zonke aziyiyo yonke indawo, oko kukuthi, azikwazi ukuba nefuthe kwiimeko zonke ezingqubuzanayo ngaphandle kokungafani.

Khuphiswano

Indoda-shark kuyo yonke into ithambekele ekulandeleni kuphela iminqweno yakhe, ayinomdla kwiimbono zabanye. Akaqapheli ukuphazamiseka kwaye ukholelwa ukuba ukunqoba kwesinye kusoloko kuthetha ukutshatyalaliswa komnye. Ngomgudu wokufezekisa injongo yakhe, umntu onjalo, ngaphandle kokungabaza, uya kuhamba kwiintloko. Kwimpahla yakhe yeenqwelo-mvume inokuba yinto engekho yomthetho kunye nezenzo zokuziphatha, unokukhetha ngokukhawuleza ukukopela, ukugwenxa okanye ukucaphukisa. "I-Shark" ihlala ifuna ukufumana konke ukuzaliseka kolwazi malunga notshaba, kodwa aluyi kuze lugcine igama lakhe elihle okanye intuthuzelo engokomoya.

Lo mgca wokuziphatha ungagqibelelwa kuphela kwinani elingabalulekanga lamatyala. Ngokuqhelekileyo, oku kwenzeka kwiimeko ezinzima, xa umntu othile athathwe ngamagunya athile makenze ngokukhawuleza ukubeka izinto ngokulandelelana aze abone umphumo. Kuzo zonke ezinye iimeko, ukuziphatha "kwerkki" akuvumelekanga kwaye kunokukhawuleza ukutshabalalisa naluphi na ubuhlobo besikhathi eside-bobabini nabasebenzi.

Izilingo ezinobungozi ezinjalo ziza kunceda lula ukubonakalisa uvavanyo lukaTomas. Ukuziphatha ngquzulwano lomntu kuyinkathazo ebalulekileyo kwabanye, ngoko ke, ekusebenzelaneni naye, kufuneka uqaphele ngakumbi.

U lungiso

Okuchasene "no-shark" kukuthi "ibhere le-teddy". Umntu othambekele kuloo ndlela yokuziphatha unokunikela ngokukhawuleza iimfuno zakhe ukukholisa umchasi. Njengomthetho, lo ngumthwalo wabantu abanesidima esincinane, bakholelwa ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba uluvo lwabo alufanele lucatshangelwe.

Lo mgca wokuziphatha ungaphumelela kwimeko apho umxholo wesibambano awunandaba. Ukunyamekela kumchasi, unokugcina ubudlelwano obusondeleyo kunye naye, kunye nemiphumo yenkquzulwano iya kuba yinto encinci. Nangona kunjalo, ukwenqaba ukukhusela imfuno kuyo nayiphi na ingxabano ebalulekileyo kunokuchaphazela kakubi iziganeko zobomi bomntu ngokwakhe. Ubeka ingozi ekulahlekelweni kwakhe kwintlonelo kwabanye kunye nokubhekwa njengento engaphethiyo. Abantu abanjalo bahlala bezinto zokuphatha.

Ukuba ukuhlolwa kukaTomas kubonisa ukuba ukulungelelanisa, umntu kufuneka aqale ngokukhawuleza asebenze ngokuzithemba kwakhe, ngokunyuka kwawo, ukuziphatha kuya kutshintsha.

Ukuphepha

Abantu - "iifudu" azikwazi ukunyamezela iimpikiswano, kwaye ngoko ke uzama ukuyeka okanye ukuphepha ukulwa. Esi sikhundla asibonakali nje ngokungazikhusela iimfuno zomntu, kodwa nangenxa yokungalindelekanga okukhulu kwabanye abantu. Lo mntu unqwenela ukufihla kwingxaki, kwaye akazami ukuyicombulula. Isizathu salokhu ukungabikho kokuzithemba nokuxakeka kwexhoba.

Lo mgaqo unokuthi ulungele ukuba ngaba imbambano yongquzulwano ayibalulekanga kumabini omabini. Kuzo naziphi na iingxaki ezinzulu, kunokukhokelela ekukhuleni okungakumbi kokungaqondani phakathi kwabantu kunye nokuqokelelwa kwamabango athile. Okubuhlungu kakhulu kumacala omabini, ukuxhatshazwa kwexesha elide, ngokukhawuleza okanye kamva, kugqiba ukuqhuma kwemvakalelo kunye nokucaciswa ngokukhawuleza kobudlelwane. Imiphumo ebuhlungu yale nto ingenakuguquka.

Ukuba uvavanyo lukaTomas lubonise le siphumo, umntu kufuneka abe nesibindi kwaye angabi ukoyika iingxaki. Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba kuphela ingxaki esisombululiyo, i-non-resolved ithoxisa umntu wamandla akhe kwaye yenza ubomi bakhe bungeke bubekezeleleke. Awukwazi ukufihla kule nto.

Ukungqinelana

Iingqungquthela zihlala zizama ukuxoxisana notshaba. Nangona kunjalo, ukwaneliseka okwanelisayo kwimimiselo yomabini omabini, njengomthetho, akukhokelela ekupheleni kombambano kwaye usebenza nje ngokuba ngumphefumlo.

Indawo ebuthakathaka yendawo yokuxhatshazwa kukuxhomekeka ngokupheleleyo kwisimo somdlali, kwaye ukuba akayilungele ukuyeka nayona nxalenye encinci yeminqweno yakhe, "i-fox" iya kuhlala ilahlekile. Kwakhona kwenzeka ukuba iqela eliphikisayo ligqithise ngokweqile imfuno zalo, kwaye ngokobubele "libahlangule kwizinga elilifuna ngokwenene. Kungoko, phambi kokunciphisa, kuyimfuneko ukuba ube nolwazi olunokwenzeka malunga nomxholo wesibambano, ukuze ungapheli kwisitya esiphukileyo.

Abantu, ukuvavanya okuboniswe ngolu hlobo, kufuneka babe nesigqibo esiphezulu kunye ngokuthe ngqo ekukhuseleni iimfuno zabo.

Ukusebenzisana

Indlela efanelekileyo kakhulu yokusombulula ingxabano kukufumana isisombululo esinelisekisa ngokupheleleyo amabango omabini omabini. Kule nto, ubuchule nobubulumko obufunekayo abukhoyo. Yingakho abantu abathambekele kule migaqo yokuziphatha babesithiwa ngama-"owls".

Abantu - "amaqhweba" bakhetha ukungathathi ngecala langaphandle lenkquzulwano, kodwa zama ukuqonda isizathu salo. Ukongeza, banako ukunyaniseka kunye nabachasi babo kwaye bavumelane ngokufanelekileyo nendlela yakhe yokunxibelelana. Siyabonga ngala maqhinga, bajika utshaba ukuba lube ngumlingani, kwaye ingxabano ixazululwe ngokukhawuleza ngoqhagamshelwano olwakhayo.

Ukuba uvavanyo lukaTomas lubonise esi sizathu, unokumhalalisa ngokukhuselekileyo indoda. Ubomi bakhe akufuneki kubekho iimbambano ezinkulu kunye neengxabano, kwaye ukuqonda kwakhe kuya kumnceda aphumeze kakhulu.

Ixabiso lovavanyo

Uvavanyo lweTomas-Kilman luvame ukusetyenziswa ukuvavanya abasebenzi xa beqesha. Ngeziphumo zalo, kulula ukugweba ukuziphatha ngokubanzi. Indlela kaTomas ikuvumela ukuba uhlole ukuba yeyiphi indawo umntu ekhethayo xa ejongene noogxa kunye nabaphathi. Kwakhona, le ngcaciso iya kunika ingcamango yendlela ukubonakala komqalayo kuya kuchaphazela ngayo umoya jikelele kwiqela.

Phinda uvavanyo uTomas uya kuba luncedo kuwo wonke umntu. Uya kunceda ukuvavanya ukuziphatha kwabo kwaye baqonde oko kukuthintela ekuphumeleleni ngokuphumelelayo iingxabano kunye nokuhlala ebudlelwaneni obuhle nabanye.