Ungazami ukukholisa wonk 'ubani - yindlela yokuhluleka

Ngaba kukho nawuphi na owakuthandayo nakubani na umntu ehlabathini? Ngaphandle. Kwaye uNyana kaThixo wayenomdla, wayesebenza ngamandla kangangokuthi banquma ukumlahla ngokupheliswa komzimba. Sinokuthi ntoni ngaboni? Nangona kunjalo, kukho abantu abafuna ukukholisa wonke umntu. Bafuna ngale ndlela ukuze baphumelele impumelelo abayithathayo ekuqhubekeni okungenakuqhaqha kwamanqanaba emisebenzi kunye nokwakhiwa kobudlelwane obungenanto-mpikiswano nabanye. Le ndlela yasetyenziselwa ukusetyenziswa kwansuku zonke ngokucacileyo, njengokukwazi "ukungena ngaphandle kwensipho". Ukukhawuleza okanye kamva umnqweno wokukholisa wonke umntu unye ukukhokelela kwimpikiswano, kwaye imiphumo yakhe ingaba yinto engathandabuzekiyo.

Kuthetha ukuthini "ukuthanda"?

Xa intombazana ithetha ngomfana osemthandayo, ngokuqhelekileyo uthetha isimo sothando esekelwe kwizinto ezintle (okwenyaniso okanye ukukholelwa) kwakhethiweyo. Isizathu sokubonakalisa iimvakalelo zesisa kwintsholongwane yolutsha sinokuba nayiphi na into: inqanaba eliphezulu lobunzima, umzimba oqinileyo, ubuso obuhle, i-wardrobe ephathekayo, ubukho beebhanki kwipokothini nakwezinye iziphambano (umzekelo, ukuhlambalaza, ukuthatha isibindi). Ngokwesiqhelo, abafana baxoxa ngokufanayo, bahlala bekhona ngaphezu kobuso obuhle kunye nobuso obuhle, kwaye bonke, sele benengqondo. Kodwa wonke umntu uthanda izinto ezahlukeneyo, kwaye ekugqibeleni, wonke umntu ufumana iibini ngokwabo. Ngelo xesha, abantu abatsha, njengomthetho, abanqweneli ukuthanda uthando jikelele, bafezekisa iimvakalelo ezingaphezulu okanye ngaphantsi kwenjongo. Kukho, ke, abo bafaka izakhono zabo ukuba bathande ngendlela echanekileyo, kodwa baphoqeleka ukuba basebenzise izixhobo ezahlukeneyo, kuba akukho mntu uvelise iindlela zendalo. Izidalwa ezininzi eziphilayo zifana neziqhamo okanye amajikijolo ukunambitha, kodwa xa uhamba ngokuloba, kukufanelekile ukuba uthathe kunye nabo, kodwa unako konke okusemandleni okusebenza.

Izizathu zokuba abantu bafuna ukuthanda wonke umntu

Ngaba le mphu melelo iphumelele kangakanani, umbuzo wesibini. Ekugqibeleni, bonke abayingcwele bachitha amandla akhe, banikezela ezininzi iimfundiso zakhe, uthetha ngezenzo ngezinye iinkcukacha, kungekhona nje ngokuba uhlobo lwakhe luyikholui. Ezi zithetha kuphela ukuba ukhonza injongo. Kwaye nokuba yinto ekholisayo. Ngokomzekelo, umntu ufuna ukuziva iimfuno kunye nokubaluleka kwakhe, kwaye uthembele kuphela kwimbono yesininzi. Omnye ukwesaba ulolololo, kwaye endaweni yokufumana abahlobo bokwenene (abangenayo ininzi), uzama ukuzungezeza "nabahlobo abanolwazi". Kwenzeka ukuba umntu akafuni ukuphoxeka abo bamamkelayo umxhasi wakhe, okanye uloyiko lokungqubana, kungenxa yoko uyavuma. Kwaye kunokukho nezinye izizathu, ezifana nesetyala esingacacileyo, ukuzithoba, kunye nokukwazi ukuthanda abantu ngokwenene (kunye nam ngokwam) kwaye uzame ukuhlawulela le mvakalelo enhle yokukhanga.

Iindlela kunye neendlela

Eli li shishini elinzima kwaye linzima. Ukuze ufumane uvelwano lwabantu abanamanye amaqondo neengcamango ezingavisisaniyo malunga namaxabiso, kufuneka sijonge "imigca yokungathathi hlangothi" phakathi kwamasimangqangi "asebenzayo". Oku kunzima, kwaye umnqweno onjalo wokugcina ukulinganisela unika umxholo kumlingiswa, kunye nendlela yokuziphatha, kunye nakubonakala.

Ngokudakisayo, kodwa ukuzama ukufezekisa impumelelo ngendlela elula, kufuneka usebenze nzima kakhulu. Kubantu abanjalo, ukuqaphela ukubonakaliswa kwiqhayiya lokudumisa kubalulekile. Kudinga inqanaba eliphezulu lokuzibhokoxa ukuze ungayikhohlwa ukuba ngubani, yintoni na xa kuthethwa, ngenye indlela inhlazo ngendlela yokuthetha okungalunganga okufunekayo okwangoku kungenakupheka. Yaye yonke ixesha kufuneka ukhwezele, uxinzelele ubuso bakho. Uphendule intamo kuyo yonke indawo. Kwaye uthetha izinto ezintle kuphela. Futhi ungalokothi ulahlekelwe kwizabelo. Yaye ukuba umntu ecela inkonzo yakhe, ngokuzimisela kunye novuyo olubonakalayo ukuqonda ngokukhawuleza isizathu. Kancinci ihlawulela ixabiso elikhethekileyo kunye nekhefu elimnandi lomqolo, ongadluliyo.

Ngokuqhelekileyo, ukwesaba.

Ukuhlaselwa

Kungekudala emva koko kuza. Ngokuqhelekileyo isizathu sokungabikho kwintlukwano yinto ethile yongquzulwano eyaphunyezwe ukulawula kwaye idluliselwe "kwisigaba esishisayo". Ngamanye amaqela akhuthaza zonke iindawo zokugcina, ngeli xesha ekufanele acinge ngale nto "kuzo zonke izinto umntu othandekayo" njengomlingani. Kwaye apha iqala. Omnye ukuxhasa - omnye uya kukhubeka. Ukuvakalisa ukungathathi hlangothi akuphumeli, nokuba ngamacandelo omabini anganeliseki. Kwaye ke, xa befumana ulwalamano, banako "ukuthatha umphefumlo wakho" kwi-renegade, kunye kunye nokuyixabela. Ukuqonda ukuba umnqweno kubo bonke abanjengayo-isitshixo sokungaphumeleli, ngokukhawuleza kuza emva kwexesha. "Umntu othakazelisayo" uchongiwe nenkosikazi engumntu omdala. Kukho ukuwa, xa kuthelekiswa naluphi na ukutshatyalaliswa kwi-duel yangasese kuyisabelo esinomdla.