Ex-Umfazi akukho sizathu kuba andikafi

manani mtshato kwilizwe lethu likhula ngokuthe ngcembe unyaka nonyaka. Kwaye yiloo nto kanye amanani ezisemthethweni kunye izibakala. Nendlela abantu abaninzi 'ebaleka kude ", nje ngokuphila kumtshato waseburhulumenteni, akunakwenzeka ukuba ukubala.

Kuba abafazi abaninzi kulwalamano ezintsha isikhubekiso uba ex-ngumfazi. Kudla incamathele kuyo kwaye umntwana, yaye maxa wambi ngaphezu kwesinye. Kwaye ukuba, xa engena kolu lwalamano ezitsha, nto leyo eye yaba olungeyomfuneko ukusuka kwisiqingatha sesibini ukuba ngandlel 'balahle, alwenzeki umntwana yangaphambili. Ukuba umntu uhlala akemi isazela nokuphila, iqabane lakhe baye ubunokwazi kuyinyamezela into efana "ex-Umfazi", nto leyo akusoloko kulula ukuyenza.

Psychology - into engaqhelekanga, yaye ienjini - into twisisaka. umfazi engena umtshato nayo indoda imbali ex-ngumfazi, uqala ukuzifanisa nalo, ngokwenjenjalo yandisa kwabo nokuzixabisa. Amaxesha amaninzi, oku kwenzeka engaqondanga, nxamnye iminqweno ezininzi ezisandula-nomfazi, kodwa kunzima ukwenza nto, nangona oko kunokwenzeka.

Le meko ngcono kancinci ukuba ex-umfazi luqala umntu waqubisana kwakhona-batshate. Ke intlanganiso kunye naye la madoda aya kuncitshiswa abe ubuncinane, nomfazi wakhe ngoku ngandlela ukuzola.

Kaloku, ukuba imeko ayikho lucky kakhulu, ngoko ke kufuneka uzame ubunokwazi ukushenxa sothelekiso, ukuzama ngokwam sikholelwe ukuba umntu ngamnye ufana yedwa, yaye ezinye iimpawu zakho nomtsalane ebantwini ixesha ngakumbi okwangoku apho. Yaye ngaloo nto ufuna ukuqhubekeka ngokuzolileyo ukuze baphile ngaphandle Ukucofa ngokwabo phezu nto.

Ngokutsho bengqondo abaninzi, amadoda nayo kuthelekiswa abafazi bakhe bangaphambili, engu ngala. Oku kakhulu yendalo kwaye kaninzi kwenzeka ngokuzenzekelayo.

Ngaphandle kuthathelwa ingqalelo ukungathembani loomama bakholelwa ukuba xa bethelekisa le ndoda ukuba ukhetha yakuqala, oko konke Akukubi. Ngapha koko, akukho namnye unako 'kutsiba' intloko enye indoda, ukuze afumanise oko akucingayo. Ke ukuba uthelekisa wakhetha ebomini namhlanje, yaye umfazi yangoku emi emva kwakhe kunye nesikhonkwane lothuli esandleni sakhe? Akufuneki ude ube ndinobushushu nomsindo, kungcono kakhulu ukuba ukwamkela nje cwaka ubunyani yokuthelekisa, njengokuba nelingenakutsitywa ebomini.

Ukuba kungcangcazelisa omthandayo ongunogqwashu rhoqo, yamkhweletela ezidlulileyo wakhe, ukuze bacinge ngendlela ukubuyisela i ex-ngumfazi. Ngenxa yokuba ngamanye amaxesha abantu bayahlukana ngenxa ezinye izizathu mbumbulu-up, ngenxa yokuba ababanga nako ukufumana phandle into, nento ukuthetha ngayo.

ukuziphatha kwakhe umfazi ukuphikisa okanye ukuqinisekisa ukuba ingcamango yokuba umfazi owayesakuba ingcono. Ukuze wenze oku, kufuneka ungenzi nantoni na engaqhelekanga, nje ngokwaneleyo ukuba ngokusisigxina "Isicatshulwa" le ndoda uthelekiso rhoqo nekhwele, yaye, njengoko abathile endithanda ukuyenza andiyenzi, "wabona" umyeni wakhe ukuba ahlawule isondlo. Nomkakhe, ngakumbi leyo owayesakuba ngumlingane, kwaye ufuna ukubuyela emva, nto nje esandleni.

Ukushwankathela, sinokutsho ukuba kukwakha ubudlelwane yosapho ayikho lula. Ngoko ke ukuba ixesha elide yaye elide kufuna efanayo ukuqonda, uthando nentlonelo omnye komnye. Kakade ke, umntu umonde ziingelosi nonobuchule ezigudileyo ngaphandle iingxabano.