Ukukhululwa codependency endleleni eya enkululekweni

Xa kuziwa ngamakhoboka, uninzi lwethu kukho imifanekiso yabantu abanengxaki ekuthiwa-imichiza abaxhomekeke (ukuba likhoboka lotywala, iziyobisi, ukutshaya). Ukongezelela ukuxhomekeka esiyisebenzisa overreliance kwikhompyutha (imidlalo, social networks) gembula.

Noko ke, kukho intsebenziswano ukuxhomekeka ukuba yahlukile kwezinye iintlobo ukuxhomekeka ebandakanya abantu ubuncinane emibini kule nkqubo. Kunye nenkululeko codependency kungakhokelela isisombululo ezinye iingxaki ezininzi, ukuba ukusetyenziswa kweziyobisi, okanye "ephilayo" womnatha yoluntu.

Kufuneka wazi ukuba alwe

Ukuze balahle codependency, kufuneka kuqala siqonde ukuba yintoni na noko kuyingozi. Kukho kakhulu uluhlu olude lweempawu abantu codependency, siya Mandidwelise ezinye zazo:

• umntu codependent kumnandi xa abanye emelene;
• kokujamelana ukuziva unetyala ngenxa ingxaki yomnye umntu;
• woyika nokukucekisa;
• Iluthe ihlabathi 'abamnyama' yaye 'white ";
• ngokugqith idealize abanye uze lumcaphukela ngezinto musa ukuzithethelela akulindeleyo;
• Yena akakwazi ukwahlula phakathi iingcinga kunye neemvakalelo evela iingcinga kunye neemvakalelo zabanye abantu bakhe.

Uluhlu kuyaqhubeka, kodwa zonke ezi mpawu zibonisa ubuntu Yehlisa imida engqondweni zingqondweni.

Angalulama okanye akunjalo?

Le ndlela zonyango yemveli uphendula lo mbuzo kwi-negative, becaphula ukungakwazi ukuhlangabezana nezinto eziphilayo kunye ilifa ababandakanyekayo ekubunjweni yokuziphatha oxhomekeke.

Noko ke, njengokuba uBarry Dzheney Uaynhold ibango ukuxolelwa codependency - ekhululeke kuqala ukusuka, iingxaki gqitywanga ingasonjululwanga xa umxhasi kwabaNtwana abasaKhulayo. Umntu ngamnye yabamba iqela izigaba ezibalulekileyo kwinkqubo yabo yophuhliso. Onke amanyathelo anxulumene utshintsho lomntu ukusuka kwinqanaba omnye komnye, kufuneka igqitywe ngendlela eyamkelekileyo, kungenjalo kukho umngcipheko ngendlela etenxileyo.

Mhlawumbi, kwithuba kwimbali ye client aye anyhashwa imida kwaye isiganeko, imemori khadi kunye nofundo lokuba uya kusinda inkululeko. Ukusuka codependency badla ukusahlula thina amanyathelo eziliqela, yaye kubalulekile ukuba alumke ngakumbi xa ukhulisa abantwana.

Into esemqoka - kuba inkululeko

Kwincwadi yakhe ethi, "Ukukhululwa codependency" Berry Uaynhold Ijolisa imbono inkululeko luphawu umgangatho ngamnye. Inkululeko busenza ukuba imeko ethile, zibe kuphunyezwa ugxininise ezenzeka ngaphandle kuphela. Noko ke, inkululeko akuthethi angohlwaywa kunye zibhuqe. Okokuqala kubalulekile ukuqonda, ukususela oko sifuna ukuba simahla.

Ukukhululwa codependency kubandakanya yokuqala isibheno iliso engaphakathi ukubona yayo "Mna", xa kuqatshelwe izinto ezikhokelela ukuziphatha kwethu.

Indlela alulame

Kwiimeko ezininzi, ukukhululwa sozavisimosti emgibeni ngeendlela ezimbini:

1. Ngenxa ugxininiso kwi co-uxhomekeko njengokugula, njengoko izinto zasemzini, ukuba alwe.

2. Ukusetyenziswa lokwakha ubudlelwane ezintsha nabantu ababathandayo.

Kodwa kukho indlela yesithathu, leyo lunikezelwa ethi "Liberation ukusuka codependency." Le ndlela isekelwe kwinto yokuba intsebenziswano ukuxhomekeka asinto isifo esinganyangekiyo, kwaye kakhulu ngempumelelo alungiswe.

Izakhono ngamnye endleleni eya enkululekweni

Codependent Ubudlelwane nya umntu, njengokuba ikhokelele ungabe kwemida ungubani, ukuba ukulahleka kwenxalenye self ucombulule kwenye. Sebenzela ukuphuhlisa isakhono sabo, ukuzeyisa ulwazi lilonke kukhokelela nokomelezwa imida yayo "I".

Ukuze balahle codependency kabuhlungu, namhlanje inkqubo linyathelo-12 kakhulu, nto leyo equka lokufundiswa chu ingxaki ubudlelwane co-oxhomekeke. Ngexesha lo msebenzi kule program, umntu efunda ukuthatha uxanduva ubomi babo yaye ngenxa yoko, waba ngumntu oqolileyo ngakumbi.

Codependency kanye nomphakathi

Noko ke, yokuxolelwa kwabazali akazisebenziseli nzima nangakumbi ngumba lokuba uluntu lwale mihla akanamdla kuphuhliso ngamnye. Intsebenziswano kunye neqela nomoya - oko kulungile. Kodwa ke, kwelinye icala, uluntu olusekelwe kwintsebenziswano ukuxhomekeka - isiphumo neenkomo, ungabe imida "Mna" yakhe, ukungabikho uluvo kwaye, ngenxa yoko, impembelelo ukuphefumla ngengcamango yomnye umntu.

Noko ke, abantu - ukuba a kwezentlalo akakwazi kuhlala bodwa. Kumzabalazo wenkululeko ukusuka codependency nabanye abantu ukunika inkxaso angathethekiyo kunye noncedo. Ngokukodwa, inkululeko izibini codependency ngokukhawuleza kakhulu, ngakumbi kakuhle kwaye ngaphantsi buhlungu xa zenziwa ngokukhawuleza ukuba omabini amaqabane. Ukutyelela amaqela enkxaso ezahlukeneyo kwakhona ukunceda ukukhawulezisa inkqubo impiliso ngenxa impembelelo ezintle nabanye abantu neengxaki ezifanayo. Kwaye ekugqibeleni, ukufunda iincwadi ezikhuthazayo kwi ukukhululwa ngempumelelo iya kubonelela ngezibonelelo eziyimfuneko utshintsho lobuqu.

Prevention codependency

Le nto ilula esinokuyenza ukuze ukukhusela umntwana wakho kulwalamano codependent kwixesha elizayo, oku ebuntwaneni sibe nolwalamano olomeleleyo kunye naye, kodwa kwangaxeshanye ukuhlonipha imida yakhe. Ukuze wenze oku, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba umntwana - nto umntu onelungelo iimvakalelo zabo neemvakalelo. Xa into uyakwalela indoda encinane usoloko kuvumelekile, ukuze singabi saba uyakholelwa kwisiqu sakho kwaye bathembele komnye umntu, uluvo "elifanelekileyo".