Ingxaki ooyise noonyana: umba. Ootata and Sons: kwingxaki ubudlelwane

Ingxaki obungunaphakade ooyise noonyana, ebesoloko ekho. Ihlala kukuba kwi kwisigaba esithile yentsebenziswano "-umntwana omdala" kukho ungquzulwano efuna ingqalelo ekhawulezileyo kunye nezisombululo okusoloko kuyinzuzo. Ingxaki kwizizukulwana kukodwa ungquzulwano elibukhali kakhulu. Amaqela kunzima ukufikelela kwisivumelwano kuba nje ngalunye izimvo zalo malunga kufuneka zilungelelaniswe njani ubomi.

Amaxesha amaninzi, abazali ukoyika nje ngokwenyaniso abantwana babo, yaye ngoko ke kufuna ukulawula kuzo zonke izenzo zabo. Abantwana ababuqondi, bavakalelwa ukuba inkululeko yazo imiqathango, yaye ngabom. Kodwa umzali alize negative ngokumalunga umntwana, ukuze ndithethe, kwiingozi, ngoxa inzala ngamanye amaxesha bakulungele ukubandezeleka ngenxa lo mgaqo. Le yeyona ngxaki iphambili zooyise kunye nabantwana. Iimpikiswano yahluke kakhulu: umnqweno yokuzithethelela umbono wakhe phambi kokuba ukhuseleko ngenzondelelo ubuntu.

indlela jikelele ingenzeka kukho ukungaqondani phakathi kwezizukulwana

Uninzi nempixano ecace wayolula ikakhulu ukudala ootata kunye nabantwana. rhoqo ingxaki ngokwezizukulwana akezi isivumelwano eqhelekileyo, ukuqonda uve omnye komnye impikiswano, iimbono umzabalazo lithemba, neentsingiselo, izimvo. Ngakwicala omnye kubonakale ukuba abantwana bakhule nambulelo, kodwa elikhuselayo nje ukuba bangoobani, iinto zonke ukuba lokuzimela kwaye self-ngokwaneleyo. Omnye umbuzo kukuba ingaba bakulungele kulo ukuzimela, leyo kunjalo ekondleni kukhala? Mhlawumbi akunjalo. Abantwana kunye nabantu abatsha nangoku ngokwaneleyo ubuntwana ukuqala ubomi elizimeleyo: eziziziqalelo akayi kuba nako ukunika bona kunye nendawo yokuhlala, ukutya okunesondlo.

"Mna omdala!"

Amaxesha amaninzi, eli binzana kunokuthiwa endikuvileyo njengomntwana ezilishumi elinesithathu okanye elinesithandathu. Ufuna ukwenza njengoko ebona kufanelekile, ukuphumeza iingcamango zabo ngqindilili kunye neenjongo. Nangona kunjalo, kufuneka kukhunjulwe ukuba elivisayo kubaluleke ngakumbi ukuba babambelele umgaqo kunokuba ngokwenene ukwenza into. Yaye uthi nomzali kaninzi kuba ayikabikho andikwazi thethana ngayo ngenye indlela. Kufuneka ukuba ezijikeleze waqonda ukuba njengoko umntu omdala kwaye kwabanjwa indoda. Kulo mzekelo, enyanisweni, yena esengumntwana, kwaye zilungele ubomi ngokupheleleyo ozimeleyo.

ingxaki ngokwezizukulwana ngokufuthi mandundu yi kukuba umntwana akaqondi ukuba kuthetha ntoni ukuba umntu omdala. Yena uvakalelwa ukuba eyona nto ibalulekileyo - ukuba abe nako ukubonisa ubumsulwa bakhe kwimbambano, ingcamango, kodwa eneneni kufike ukukhula lokwenene xa umntu oselula ilungele wozibonela kwaye baphile ngokupheleleyo ngokuzimeleyo. Asingabo bonke ilungele ukuba eli nyathelo, njengoko yokwahlukana nabazali babo 18, 20, engama-25 nangaphezulu.

"Wena banxibe inkanuko!"

Oku kuphawula ke weva kwintetho yakhe endala abantwana. Abazali bakholelwa ukuba inzala yabo akhule ngokukhawuleza okugqithisileyo, anxibe iimpahla emaxhobeni zabo, naye ezitsala ingqalelo yabanye. Abantwana nabo babe nombono eyahlukileyo ngokupheleleyo le meko. Bacinga ukuba abazali ndibaphaphele kakhulu, musa ukuvumela ngokwakho ukuba xi njengenyathelo.

Yintoni na abazali? Kucacile ukuba ngokupheleleyo wena uthanda ukunxiba umntwana wakho; ezinye iintlobo ezinga qhelekanga ngomncedisi, kumnyama okanye, icala, imibala ngokugqithiseleyo eqaqambileyo. Kodwa eyona nto intle kakhulu onokuyenza - kukuthatha ukhetho umntwana wakho. Zihlonele mntu kuyo - kwaye ke ngenye imini uya kukuphulaphula uluvo lwakho. Abantwana kufuneka sibe nomonde yaye musa unamathele ukuphuma imikhosi 'ukuzimela "zabo, ekhumbula ukuba akukho ngentsimbi elizimeleyo.

Imizekelo yeengxaki abazali nabantwana: nentombi elinesihlanu leminyaka, ndisiya ngomhla, ipeyintiweyo phambi esipilini. Unina wenza sokumakishwa kwakhona: mfutshane isondo lengubo, ebangela makeup. Ngenxa yoko, intombi ka-mthetho waza wathumela ngabom. Le ngxaki ayilungiseki. Ntombi esakhula, kwaye alikwazi ziqulathe ngokwayo.

Ubeminyaka ilishumi linamithandathu ezelwe uyakuthanda ukuphulaphula liyanyikima umculo. Yonke imali yam epokothweni, leyo yena yedwa abazali, yena lichitha ukuthenga CDs umculo. UYise akayithandi bebuthanda nonyana wakhe, angathanda ukubona kwixesha elizayo imbaleki ngempumelelo. Kuzo zonke amathuba, uyise uxelela unyana wakhe uyithandayo yakhe malini nantoni kwaye ayikwazi nibalelwe ekuthini nibufanele indoda yokwenene. UNyana na okha akhutyekiswe, kodwa hayi ukutshintsha indawo yayo. Conflict ngababuthuntu, kodwa elide.

umahluko phakathi umdla

Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba abazali kunye nabantwana ukuze abe nembono efana twatse ebomini, ngaphandle nje ezimbalwa, kukho phantse ngokupheleleyo idyll. Oku eqhelekileyo yaye akuyomfuneko ukuzama ukuqinisekisa ukuba wonke ubani uthanda yonke into. Ukongeza asifanele, ukulibala ukuba kubalulekile ukuba abazali ukuba umoya woxolo nenzolo, lo gama njengokuba abantwana kufuneka ukunxibelelana babo noontanga, iminyhadala, njalo - ingxolo olutshintshayo.

Iingxabano kungabangela ooyise kunye nabantwana. Ingxaki ubudlelwane ngokukhawuleza yakha apho kukho umahluko eziphathekayo kuthiwa yempixano ephikisanayo.

nengxaki yezindlu eyahlukileyo

Mhlawumbi udaba ethe, leyo kwenzeka kuphela ubudlelwane "umzali nomntwana". Kakade ke, oku kusebenza kubantwana abadala eniye iminyaka elishumi elinesibhozo ukuya kumashumi amabini eminyaka ubudala, kunye nabantu abatsha. Njengoko bekhula engenanto ukuzimela, umnqweno ukubona iziphumo zemisebenzi yabo. Kulo mzekelo, unotshe kude iyintsomi osondeza ingxaki zooyise kunye nabantwana. Iimpikiswano phezu kakhulu: umntwana kufuneka afunde ukuzimela ngokupheleleyo. Kodwa asingabo bonke usapho unalo ithuba phambili ukubonelela umntwana yonke into kufuneka uthenge kuye kwigumbi ukuya kwindawo apho uya sikulungele ukunika ngokwabo ngokuzimeleyo. Abo akukho mali ukuthenga indlu, kufuneka ubunokwazi uphume kule meko: ukuze athathe indawo yokuhlala esizimeleyo okanye ukuqhubeka siphila kunye nabazali babo. Xa kunjalo, xa umfana okanye ibhinqa, akuba ndandineminyaka engama engqiqo, phantsi kophahla ikhaya lakhe, kufuneka ukuba negalelo imali yentsapho. Ngapha koko, abazali akufuneki ukondla nendlu ongaphezu kobudala nabantwana, bekuya kuba kubi kakhulu.

Iinkolelo kunye namagugu

Ingxaki zooyise kunye nabantwana (elubala ukuba izizukulwana abadala kunye nabancinane kufuneka ukuphulaphula Druk enye, akusoloko baqonda ngokuchanekileyo) ayisoloko inzondo efanayo nokungaqondi. Abazali bacinga ukuba xa umntwana omdala uhlala nabo, kufuneka aphile odolo zazo, yonke bangayenzayo ngokomlomo wabo. jaha onovuyo ukuba nizahlule, yonke imihla, umzekelo, musa ukuvumela ukuba imali.

Oqala ngayo ukuphila, iinkolelo, abazali nabantwana, maxa wambi ungquzulwano elisezantsi, liya kuba into eyahlukileyo. Ngapha koko, wonke umntu uba iinjongo zabo kunye neminqweno. Ukuphumeza abantwana ayibonakali ngokukhawuleza, ngamanye amaxesha kufuneka umgudu omkhulu.

Ingxaki imida kunye nenkululeko

Nabani na waphila iminyaka kwicala abaninzi kunye nabazali babo, baze emva koko ekugqibeleni wafumana ithuba yokuthenga izindlu zabo, akukho mathandabuzo, baqonde amancedo yokuhlala eyahlukileyo. Abazali kuba igolide kakhulu, kodwa umsebenzi wabo yokukhulisa abantwana, ukuba kungathathwa kwenziwe xa umntwana sele ifikelele kumgangatho elungileyo ukuzimela it ukukwazi ukuqesha indawo yokuhlala, ukutya ngokwahlukileyo, ukuqinisekisa wena ubomi, ukulungisa imiba asakhulayo. Ngamafutshane, kufuneka uthathe uxanduva, kwaye ke kuphela badlule abantu abadala. Ngokwawo, inkululeko kufuna utyalo ezinkulu, iinzuzo azikho kwangoko azikaqapheleki.

Ukuhlala phantsi kophahla efanayo kunye nabazali babo, sinokuthi singaqondanga kuwuhlambela indawo yabo, yaye ngempazamo aphazamisane nolwethu. Kuyimfuneko ukuba bagqale ngentliziyo, baqiqe, ukuba akayi zahlulwe. Kakade ke, asingabo bonke abantu ithuba, kodwa ke kufuneka ukwamkela imithetho ezikhoyo kusapho lwakho. Wayitsala umgca, bebuzana, ungquzulwano kunye nabazali ngoxa kwabo, ngokungafanelekileyo, emabi, nokubi.

Imizekelo ukungavumelani ngoncwadi

Enye eziphawuleka kakhulu ingxaki zooyise kunye nabantwana. Imisebenzi uncwadi Russian yamandulo kusibonisa imizekelo kubonakaliswa imbambano. Ngoko nangoko bakhumbula oonobumba abaziwayo: Eugene Bazarov kunye Pavel Petrovich Kirsanov, 'ukulwa "kwi Kungquzulwano ngomlomo ukuba ingcamango. Ngaphandle kwezi, kukho amaqhawe yedrama "Ukuna": UCatherine, abo bangakwazanga aphile grumpy-mthetho, kunye nomyeni wakhe Tikhon ubomi yonke wayethimb iminqweno unina.

iingxaki Modern ooyise nabantwana

Ukuza kuthi ga ngoku, kukho ungquzulwano kwezizukulwana kwakunye kwiminyaka emininzi eyadlulayo. Izizathu umahluko umahluko izilangazelelo, iimbono ngobomi, iinkolelo, ingxaki yezindlu. Le yokugqibela lubuhlungu ukuba baninzi, ngenxa yokuba azinazo amakhaya abo kuba abantu abaselula ejika ithemba ebomini elincinane uyalahlekelwa.

Akukho mntu uzama ukubonisa msulwa umdlali yakhe, ootata kunye nabantwana. ingxaki ubuhlobo ngokufuthi axhomekeke nokungafuni ukuqonda zomnye iimfuno ingqalelo.

Amanyathelo ukulondoloza ulwalamano ukuthembela

Abo banqwenela iminyaka emininzi ukukholisa abantu abathandayo, ukuze baqonde ngcono iintshukumisa izenzo zabo mibono nje, iingcebiso zethu lokuposa. ngomsonto Strong oxhulumene nabanye ooyise noonyana. Ingxaki kwizizukulwana rhoqo kuxhomekeke kwinto yokuba abantu abakwazi ukuqonda omnye. Zibonakala ukuthetha iilwimi ezahlukeneyo. Abantwana kufuneka baphathwe ngentlonelo abazali, hlonipha namava abo nobulumko, musa ukuba neentloni, ukuba abathile izakhono luncedo. Abazali bazuza unxibelelwano trust enyanisekileyo kunye nabantwana abadala: ulwazi lwabo akakwazi nje usizo kabi. Kubalulekile ukufunda ukuhlonipha indawo omnye umntu, kuba yintoni na ngokwenene makayithabathe, sizame shintsha.

Ngaloo ndlela, a ebalulekileyo kubaluleke kakhulu ingxaki zooyise kunye nabantwana. Iimpikiswano, ebonisa ubukho kobunzima yentsebenziswano, azinakuqulatha oko izitshixo ukuze kwenziwe isigqibo esifanelekileyo. Omnye uye kuphela ukuba ufuna ukutshintsha into ebomini bakho, ukuba zanele kwaye ezamkelekileyo iindlela zokwenza oku.