Kutheni abantu abakhohlakeleyo kangaka? Kutheni abantu abalungileyo nobundlobongela?

Yonke imihla yobomi bethu ufumana izoyikiso oluqhubekayo zabo bonke ubukhulu. Media zayincedayo ukwazisa umntu obulele, ophangiweyo, wadubula phantsi. Rhoqo imithombo ezahlukeneyo ngcaciso imfutshane kwaziswa ukuba inkcazelo yethu ingqalelo ngeentlekele ezintsha, nezidubedube zezobupolitika. A positive, xa kuthelekiswa nemali iindaba ezimbi, ayinamsebenzi. Kubonakala ukuba lophawu elungileyo kunye ngasekhohlo elungileyo ehlabathini. Ngelishwa, le umlambo kunjalo "Ukuvaleka" intloko, ukuba namhlanje akukho mntu ucinga, kutheni abantu kakubi kangaka? Njani ukutshintsha oku? Kwaye nokuba ubuntu mihla namfesane kangaka?

Izizathu

Kutheni abantu abaninzi kangaka ugonyamelo? Impendulo iza kufunyanwa oonobangela ndlongo. Kufuneka kuqatshelwe ukuba inkohlakalo ubuso ngendlela eyahlukileyo. Kulo mzekelo, akukho nzima ukubona. Umntu ibangela enye intlungu, ukuhlupheka, kwaye ayinamsebenzi, ngokuziphatha okanye ngokwasemzimbeni, uyazi kakuhle le nto yaye ufuna ukwenza umonakalo - Ngumsebenzi onzima.

Zengqondo izizathu ezithathu abantu okhohlakeleyo:

• Ukunganeliseki kunye nobomi. Umntu aneliseke iqashiso labo, ngokufuthi zibethwa ntshikilelo, ukudandatheka. Ezi neemvakalelo exakeke kakhulu kunye umphefumlo wabo, ukuba nawuphi na umzuzu ukulungele ukuba ukwahlukana. Kungenxa yoko le nto zonke izoyikiso rhoqo iphalale noomama abantwana. Abanye abantu phantsi kwempembelelo ngumsindo, bawaphule amasebe umthi, ebetha izilwanyana. Le meko kwengqondo anobungozi, kuba umnini esongela ukuvela nezifo nokuphazamiseka engqondweni. Ngaphandle konke oku, izoyikiso rhoqo kakhulu shortens ukuba ubomi, kukhokelele kuphuhliso nesifo sentliziyo okanye iingxaki ndawonye nesikhumba.
• Ngabandayo. Amaxesha amaninzi oku kuphakamisa le inkohlakalo nasihlahla. Abanye abantu musa nokuba uzame ukuqonda indlela intlungu kunokubangela izenzo zabo yaye maxa wambi amagama. Abaqondi indlela ebuhlungu omnye. Kulo mzekelo, into inkohlakalo yabo uba sisidalwa buthathaka, nto leyo akakwazi ukubonisa iimvakalelo yaye achaze intlungu wabangela.
• iimvakalelo zinganakwa. Ngamanye amaxesha umntu ubonisa ndlongo "kwicala". Oku kuziphatha ziqhelekile abo kubomi babo bemihla ngemihla ukufihla rhoqo ifihlakale iminqweno, iimvakalelo, iminqweno. Kakhulu iphawuleka loo nkohlakalo nabantwana abadala-up (ingakumbi amakhwenkwe), eyakhulela kwintsapho abazali ngegqudu. Abasebenzi banyanzelwa ukuba ukuzalisekisa kwelase-odolo abaziintloko, ngaphandle kokuba akwazi ukuchonga intando yabo, phantsi kweemeko ezithile, ukuze nikucikide ukhohlakale enogonyamelo kakhulu.

unya zembali

Isizukulwana esidala uthanda ukuba sizibuze - kutheni abantu abaninzi kangaka ugonyamelo kuvela? Nantso phambi wonke ngobubele loo. Ukuphulaphula izikhalazo zabo, engazi uyawamkela. Omnye kuphela ukuvula iphephandaba okanye ubukele iindaba.

Ngaphambili, abantu baba ngobubele. Kubalulekile ingqalelo. Phambi koko - xa loo? Kumawaka eminyaka eyadlulayo, xa bachuma mu? Kaloku, aba bantu kuba ekuhambeni kwexesha nokuba ukuzithethelela. Babeke kwakudala. Yaye sengqondo elingcono malunga ummelwane wakho akazi. Kwaye mhlawumbi ngobubele abo owayehlala ixesha Kwamacala? Okanye ngexesha ulawulo Stalin kaThixo? Abantu abaninzi behleli ezintolongweni ngenxa aqatha. Zingaphi ezinjalo "Dobryakov" ngenyameko wazama ukuba afundise ummelwane wakhe "isipho"!

Kutheni kukho imvakalelo yokuba namhlanje abantu abaninzi kangaka ugonyamelo? Kakade ke, igalelo elenziwe eendaba. Xa xesha yenkululeko, babeye banikele ingqalelo engakumbi ububi. Kufuneka kuqatshelwe ukuba inqanaba abantu kunye noluntu liye landa, ngoko ke ndlongo kunjalo kubonakala kakhulu.

Ubuhlobo bomkhaya

Bonke abantu badla abe ndlongondlongo. Kwezinye, yenzeka kunqabile kakhulu. Abanye badla ukubonisa ndlongo. Ngelo xesha enze nasiphi na isenzo bongela, yaye ngokufuthi noqhambuko ukwasuleleka ngabantu abalungileyo ngenene. Ngelishwa, bonke ububi iphalale phezu kwabo kakhulu ababathandayo. Kuba abo ngokwenene kwaye ibiza kakhulu. Kutheni abantu abakhohlakeleyo kangaka? Yintoni eyenza ukuba "ndinyothule" nomsindo usapho kunye nabanye ukunqanda kokuvutha komsindo? Kutheni ukunxibelelana nabantu esibathandayo ukulawula ukuziphatha yabo ibe?

Ngenxa nezalamane akuyi ndawo. Ukuthetha abasemzini, okubambezelayo ngokwakhe umntu. Kukho izizathu ezininzi: umnqweno ukubeka iqabane kuye, nokoyika yokufelwa ngumhlobo umdla. Kwimeko kwentloko ngumchamo ezingagrogrisa ukugxothwa. Kodwa ukuba ungena kwisangqa izalamane, ingakumbi ungatyhilekanga, umntu ruffle nkqu ngegama elinye. Naso xa ngehlazo kwaqhambuka kwi indawo engenanto ngokupheleleyo oko. Kakade ke, oku luphawu engalunganga, kodwa elingathathwanga amabango ezingalunganga alahlwayo. Yiyo ke loo nto umbona, ephalaza phezu kwabo kakhulu ababathandayo. Ba, kwanokuba kakhulu sithukwa yabo nenqala nabo, kangaka wayethanda, oko kuse lula.

isihlalo yenkathazo

Imvakalelo komsindo unikwa ngokwemvelo. Kuyimfuneko ukuba ngamaxesha amanqam ukudibanisa yonke imikhosi ukuba alwe. Kodwa iza kusetyenziswa njani ngumntu ixhomekeke imimiselo yokuziphatha, zagonywa ebuntwaneni. Ukuba abazali ekuyeni umntwana ukubonisa ndlongo, ngokuqinisekileyo nomkhwezeli. Ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantwana kunye nooyise, ngokusekelwe ukoyika, kusenokwenzeka ukuba kuhluthwa ngamarhawu elivisayo noontanga. Kungenxa kusapho bakhangele ingcambu yobubi. imfundo enjalo ichaza ngokucacileyo isizathu sokuba abantu nobundlobongela.

Nangona kule meko umntwana aphuhlise omnye imodeli ukuziphatha; ugqiba okubi kwaye ukuba ityala. Loo elivisayo uwa ixhoba kakubi oontanga babo. Wayedla akazange nokuba afune iindlela zokukhusela, nikholwa okumfaneleyo ezinjalo.

Ngamanye amaxesha unobangela ndlongo ukuze ibe ugonyamelo, kunye olugqithisileyo. Le ndlela imfundo imali imvakalelo yomntwana ienjini of zibhuqe. Ofikisayo ucinga ngokwayo yeyona ibalulekileyo yaye ifuna ukuthobela olomeleleyo. Ngelishwa, abantu abafundiswa ukuba ukuhlonipha abanye abazali, ayikho enye bafumane obu bulumko. Akazange nokuba qaphela ukubathoba ngayo.

Ukungazinzi eluntwini

unobangela engangqalanga kwamkelekile ixhala ekhulayo. ukungalingani kwezentlalo, kozinzo ekhokelela imvakalelo kabi. Ekubeni TV abantu babone njengoko inkohlakalo kwakhona. Umntu ogama ingqondo ibunjiwe, uyakwazi ukwahlula ingqolowa ethabathela ezinkozweni ese exolweni, akayi kwamkela ndlongo njengento ikhwelo lokuba kusetyenzwe. Umntwana zidla ngathi imfunxa, izigcawu screen lobundlobongela. Yaye ndiyaqonda konke oku njengento uhlobo sisikolo sobomi. Kubalulekile ukuqaphela indlela ubuhlungu ingqondo yomntwana ezifana TV, kwaye impendulo yalo mbuzo: "Kutheni abantu nobundlobongela?" ngoko nangoko kufunyanwa.

ingqondo ukungaphumeleli

Oku ingakumbi xa babefikisa. Noko ke, abadala abaninzi bayahlupheka iimvakalelo efanayo omdala. Lidla Nani linganisani umfanekiso xa umntwana uyakhala phezulu esitratweni kwaye ibonisa ukuba umntu unebala eyahlukileyo okanye ukuba ukukhubazeka emzimbeni.

Abantu abadala basabela ngendlela eyahlukileyo. Kwinqanaba ienjini, baziva nemvo ingozi. Ngoko nangoko kukho umnqweno ukuhlalela kude. Kodwa abanye oko esizibonakalisa nenkohlakalo nogonyamelo. ngamanye amaxesha Le imvakalelo kukhokelela elivisayo ukuba zidlale ngaye oontanga babo, yahlukile kubo. Kutheni abantu abakhohlakeleyo kangaka? Kwakhona, ukutshintshwa lwezakhono unyamezelwano kunye nentlonipho kusapho akayi kuvumela elivisayo okanye umntu omdala ukuba uziphathe ngolu hlobo.

Indlela ukulwela ixhoba

Iingcali zengqondo zithi lweqela zilula ngokwaneleyo ukuba luhlobo luni abantu abanogonyamelo kwaye ngubani "imvu." Ngoko ke, ixhoba bundlobongela bayacetyiswa ukuba bachonge ezi mpawu zilandelayo:

• low self-esteem ;
• zezidingo;
• kukwamkelwa konke yemboniselo ukuba zonke iinkathazo ifanelwe.

Kufuneka baqalise ukuqonda i "I". Nabanina umntu inani ezilungileyo nezingalunganga. Nguye kanye apho. Kwaye oko akuthethi buhlungu ilungelo mntu. Kuphela ukwamkela ngokupheleleyo le nyaniso, singakwazi ukuhamba phambili endleleni yokukhulisa ukuzithemba, iimvakalelo zempumelelo. Umntwana kule ulwazi nga ukunceda abazali. Abadala, njengoko eyabangumzekelo yokuziphatha uye ingcambu, kungcono ukuthatha uncedo ngengqondo yobungcali.

Njengoko umthetho, nto uyithandayo elungileyo inceda ethile into entsha. Unga nokuba babhalisele kumaqela ubuciko bokulwa.

Kubalulekile ukuba siqwalasele indlela abantu abasabela ngayo umoni. Uya ndiyabona ngendlela eyahlukileyo, ukuba impendulo yahlukile akulindeleyo. Kwezinye iimeko, oko kunceda izinto ezihlekisayo. sizame ukuba singaweli ukuluma nokuba ukwalathisa ungquzulwano ezintsokothileyo lolukhulu jokes. Ngelo xesha ukufunda ukwamkela imeko ngaphantsi wayibona ezingemnandi.

Indlela ukujongana ndlongo yabo?

ezi zizathu zichazwe ngasentla ukunika ingcinga yokuba kutheni abantu abalungileyo nobundlobongela. Kodwa njani ukujongana izinto ezinjalo? Kufuneka wenze ntoni xa uqala ibile ngaphakathi?

Ngokugqibeleleyo icocwe umzimba ezimbi. Ngapha koko, ezemidlalo ufundisa ulawulo bayazi phezu iimvakalelo zakho nomzimba. Iingcali zengqondo badla yaleza ukufunda imithambo yokuphefumla. Ukwenza ukwazi ukulawula nomzimba, kunye nomoya.

Fumana kugesi ekhuselekileyo izoyikiso ephucula-up. Vyplesnite iimvakalelo zam ekhala. Kungekhona usapho okanye umlingane. Dumani apho afuneka khona. Umzekelo, ibe ifeni ekhatywayo engumlawuli okanye ukuya Ikonsathi eweni.

Hi ndlela leyi, iisayikholojisti bacebisa le ndlela: yima kufuphi ngokuhlwa kaloliwe. uya kuthatha Xa uloliwe, bekhwaza nangamandla akhe onke, njengokuba elikhulu kangangoko unako. Wheel ingxolo iza kurhaxwa naluphi isandi. Akuyi kuva, kunye nokukhutshwa umzimba lifumana izinto eziyimfuneko.

isiphelo

Khumbula ukuba ngengqiqo inkohlakalo okwenzeka phakathi kwenu, nguwe kuphela akho. Kwaye ukuba ngokupheleleyo ngaphakathi kwamandla akho. Ukuba ufuna ukufumana impendulo yombuzo "kutheni abantu ngenkohlakalo kangaka," qala ngokwakho. Hlolisisa indlela yakho. Lahla iimvakalelo zinetyhefu, kuba kungekudala emva kokuba usongela ngokuqatsela zibe ngokudandatheka.