Ezi ngxaki kubundlelwane ziqhelekileyo kunokuba ucinga

Kanye emva kwexesha, zonke iingxaki zobudlelwane bezixhomekeke ekukhetheni i-sandbox apho uza kudlala khona. Ngobudala, yonke into yaba nzima kakhulu. Ngoku kufuneka sibhekane neengxaki ezifana ne-intanethi, izicelo zonxibelelwano, ukuzinikela okuqhubekayo. Ulwalamano lwaluphi na isibini luhamba kunye neengxaki. Yintoni eqhelekileyo, kwaye yintoni enokubangela igebe? Masijongene nobunzima obuphambili. Mhlawumbi yonke into ayimbi njengoko ibonakala.

Ucinga ukuba unesifiso esifanayo

Ingxaki yokuqala yobudlelwane ayifanelekanga ingqiqo, ngenxa yokuba kulula ukubonakala kungeyona nto ephambili phambi komlingane. Oku kwenzeka nakubani na. Ingundoqo yenkinga kukuba abantu abaninzi bakholelwa ukucinga ukuba isiqingatha sabo sifuna into efanayo. Oku kukukhokelela ekulindeni okungenangqiqo kunye nokucinga malunga nokuba ubuhlobo bufanele bube bunjani. Abantu abaninzi kumatshini bakhetha ukucinga ukuba iqabane labo liyavumelana nabo kuyo yonke into. Kutheni na? Emva kwakho konke, kubonakala ngathi, yonke into ebudlelwaneni iyalungelelaniswa. Nangona kunjalo, akufanele ucinge ukuba uyazi yonke into ngaphambili. Xoxa nomlingane wakho okokufunayo. Oku kuya kukunceda ukuba ungazibandakanya kunye nolwalamano nomntu ofunayo ebomini akufani into efanayo. Kodwa nangona ufumene umntu onomdla ofanayo, kufuneka uqhubeke uxoxela zonke iinkalo ebomini. Akukho mntu unokufunda iingqondo, kuyimangalisa ukulindela oku kumntu othandekayo. Ukuba ucaphukile ukuba iqabane lakho lingabika xa esekhaya emva komsebenzi, zama ukuthetha oku, kwaye ungaqali ingxoxo kunye neengxabano. Mhlawumbi akazange acinge ngako. Kufuneka usebenzisane ukuba ufuna ukuqinisa ubudlelwane obuqinileyo. Abantu, nokuba basondelene kakhulu, banokuba nembono ehlukileyo kakhulu kwimeko. Oku kukukhokelela ekungahambisani, ukudideka kunye nokulindela okungenakwenzeka komnye nomnye.

Ucinga ukuba ubuhlobo buza kukuzalisa kunye nokwaneliseka ebomini

Akukho mntu unokuqinisekisa ukuba uxolo lwengqondo. Okokuqala, kufuneka uqonde kwaye wamukele, ngoko ke unokulindela ukuba omnye umntu unokukuqonda. Kukho iimeko xa abantu beqala ubudlelwane ngokuvuyisa, kodwa ke bajika babe ngabasemzini ababini. Oku kwenzeka ntoni? Into kukuba balahlekelwa ngokwabo! Bayeke ukwenza oko bazalise ngovuyo phambi kobudlelwane, beshiya into yokuzilibazisa baze bachithe kwiqabane. Oku akuncedi nabani na. Ungacingi ukuba ulwalamano-eyona ncoko kulonwabo, kufuneka ukwazi ukunandipha ubukho kunye noqabane.

Ulongela ukuhlukana

Mhlawumbi xa eso songelo sibonakala sisona ndlela esilungileyo yokuzikhusela kulwalamano, kodwa lixesha lokuqonda ukuba oku akunjalo. Into eyona nto enokuyenza xa uhlala esitshatileyo kukusongela umtshato okanye ukwahlukana. Ukusongela okunjalo kuyonakalisa ukuthembela kwaye kubangele ukuba bobabini abalingani bazive bekhuselekile. Bobabini bafanele bahlale bekhumbula ukuba iingongelo akufanele zibe kwiintlankqalazo ezingqongqo, kuphela ke uya kuziva uzilile kwaye awuyi kuziva ukuba awunandaba nomlingane wakho wobomi.

Uthetha kakhulu

Akuyona inkathazo yokuziphatha, ethi abesifazane bathi ngaphezu kwamadoda. Oku kunokuba nzima kunoma yimuphi umlingane. Ngomntu othetha ngokugqithiseleyo angaphuthelwa iinkcukacha zoqhagamshelwano olwenzeka ngaphandle kwamagama. Ukuba uthetha kakhulu, unyanzela iqabane lakho ukuba uthathe inxaxheba kwingxoxo xa efuna ukuvalela kwaye ucinge ngokucokisekileyo malunga nento eyenzekayo. Umntu onomdla, onengqiqo kuphela onokuba ngumlingane ontle. Ukuba awuyikunyamekela, uqala ukunamathela kwiinkcukacha uze ugwebe ngokwakho kunokuzibeka endaweni yeqabane. Funda ukuphulaphula uze ubukele indlela othetha ngayo kwaye njani. Ukunxibelelana ngokufanelekileyo kukubalulekileyo kwintsapho exonwabo.

Uloyiko lokuba uthando luye lwafa

Ubudlelwane buyatshintsha emva kokuba uchithe unyaka kunye nesiqingatha kunye. Udumo luphela, kwaye ujika kwiintando zibe ngamaqabane. Abaninzi baqala ukucinga ngenxa yolu hlobo uthando luye lwaphela. Enyanisweni, oku kuyingcipheko esitsha kwintsebenziswano, apho ingqondo yeyona nto ibaluleke ngaphezu kwe-physiology. Ukuba ulungele inxalenye yemoya yobudlelwane, eli nqanaba aliyi kuba yingxaki kuwe. Ngokuphambene noko, unokuyonwaba kwizinto ezintle, kuba kwimiba eqhelekileyo yemihla ngemihla umntu unokufumana iimpawu ezintle.

Ufike kusasa kakhulu

Abanye abantu bathi kulungile ukuhlala ndawonye ngaphambi kokuba utshate. Nangona kunjalo, uphando lubonise ukuba abantu abaqokelele ngaphambi komtshato, bahlala beshiya umtshato. Akuyimfuneko ukuqokelela, ukuba awuqinisekanga ngobuhlobo. Kungcono ukwenza oku kuphela xa uyayazi into ojolise kuyo. Ukuguqula kuphela ngenxa yokulondolozwa kweendleko okanye ezinye izinto ezifanayo azibonakalisi, zingonakalisa ulwalamano lwakho kuphela, nokuba ngaba banekamva. Cinga ngendlu eqhelekileyo kuphela xa uqinisekile ukuba bobabini bakulungele isigaba esinzulu, zinike ixesha lokudibanisa ngemihla uze ukwazi ukuhamba ngokusemandleni akho.

Awuhambi ngemihla

Mhlawumbi usele uvile le ngcebiso: kufuneka ubenyule ngezikhathi ezithile. Ngaphandle koko uyayeka ukuva nomdla omnye komnye phantsi kwengcinezelo yesiqhelo. Kwilizwe lemihla lemihla ngemihla, kubaluleke kakhulu ukufumana ixesha lokulichitha linye linye. Zonke izibini ezonwabileyo zizama ukulungiselela usuku, nangona zitshatile ixesha elide. Lo myalelo olula unobaluleke ngakumbi kunokuba ubonakala ngathi uqala ukujonga.

Uya emacimbini, ngelixa iqabane lakho ekhaya

Enye yeengxaki eziqhelekileyo kulwalamano luyinto engafanelekanga: ufuna ukuchitha ngokuhlwa ngamapjama akho, kwaye ufuna ukuya kwibha. Mhlawumbi ekuqaleni kobudlelwane uye wabuya yonke indawo kunye, kodwa emva kweminyaka embalwa umntu angaqala ukufuna ukuhlala ekhaya, ngelixa elinye liyakuliphosa amaqela. Ingxaki enzima kakhulu kwizo zibini apho iqabane elinye liyi-extrovert, kwaye elinye liyi-introvert. Zama ukuthola ukulinganisela phakathi kwexesha lakho kunye nexesha ochitha kunye kunye. Akukho mntu kwi sibini kufuneka ahlupheke ngenxa yeminqweno yomnye.

Awazi ukuba uyamkela njani iimpazamo

Le ngxaki ivela kungekudala okanye kamva, phantse phambi komntu wonke-ngamanye amaxesha ukuxolisa nokuvuma impazamo yayo kunzima kakhulu. Nangona kunjalo, le ngongoma ebaluleke kakhulu endleleni yokuxazulula ingxabano. Ukuba uvuma isohlwayo lakho kwaye uxolise, kuba lula ukuba iqabane lakho lenze okufanayo, okuqinisekisa ukuba isisombululo esinokuthula sisimo.

Uhlawula kakhulu ingqalelo kwiinkcukacha

Inyaniso yokuba iqabane lakho lilibale ukuxhoma umqulu omtsha wephepha kwindlu yangasese akuyona isono esinzulu njengoko kubonakala ngathi. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ungagcini kwiinkcukacha kunye neenkcukacha. Kwizinto ezincinci bubomi, ngoko kufuneka uhlale ungene. Kakade, ezinye iindlela zentsapho ziyakuchukumisa gqitha. Nangona kunjalo, cinga malunga nokuba le ngxabano. Akukho mntu uya kutshintsha ukuba abe yinto efanelekileyo. Ukugxininisa ezintweni ezincinci ezikucaphukisayo, uhlala ungqubana. Cinga ukuba kubaluleke kangakanani ukubeka kakuhle izitya kwisomisi nokuba ngaba uyayithanda indlela yakhe yokuqhuba? Mhlawumbi unezinye iimpawu ezinokuyikrakra? Ukuba ucinga ngolu hlobo ngokufanelekileyo, uya kuqonda ukuba akunakuze ufumane iphoso.